Do you ever feel stuck? Do you feel like you have given and received all the love you possibly can? Is the relationship you’re in diminishing? Do you feel full of love but unable to express it? Do you feel out of touch with your emotions? I’m sure most of us have answered yes to any or all of these questions at some point in our lives. It’s inevitable to eventually feel rejected or simply unreciprocated. Is this because people are inherently bad and shouldn’t be trusted? If this was the case, “World War 3” or any other number of manmade catastrophes would have destroyed this planet many times over by now. Then can we conclude that people are good and should be trusted? It’s all a matter of perspective, but if you give people the chance to shine, you allow room for growth in their lives as well as your own heart.
So many of us have standards or definitions for how everything should be in our lives. We have programmed within us, or sometimes chosen, how high the bar should be in many different facets of our lives. We think we must receive a certain amount of schooling, we must reach certain benchmarks in our schooling, we must gain full time employment, we must receive benefits, we must start a savings, we must have a family, we must travel the world, etc. These simply do not define us in any way. They do not affect who we are or the quality of our character. While the actions we take are important, it is the intent behind them, not necessarily the ‘ideal’ outcome, which makes the action proactive or destructive. We must remember this when we interact with others to avoid judgment of anyone or anything that may happen.
What argument am I making here? Basically, no matter how many times you’ve been burned in your life; there is never a time when you can just give up on people. When you do, you lose your own humanity in the process and so either become a monster or a ghost. Many times this means death; either synchronously or decidedly (also physical or ego death). Restoring your own humanity is the first step towards breaking the cycle of being ‘jaded’ about our relationships. Seeing your surroundings will bring your center of attention to the present moment and help you let go of the past grief. Appreciate all the love within your environment to appreciate the love within yourself. Pay it forward to share the experience with the next person you meet who needs it. Let go of all you have just experienced like dust to the winds of the Universe. Let love grow from this seed you have planted; see the love come back to you in new and mysterious ways.
Restore Your Humanity
Sounds pretty intense when you just say it. What do I mean by implying you have lost your humanity? Merely that you have stopped seeing people as people, and rather as objects. This has happened to me, as I’m sure it has for many. What goes on during this time? You lose touch with loved ones, you lose interest in your usual activities, you lose motivation to pursue passions, you lose the gusto from your life. For some reason, you have forgotten that objects do not matter; material wealth in no way determines the quality of your life or your character. Instead, you have trapped yourself in a prison of attachment; holding on to those memories you cherish but can no longer experience in the Now. To restore your humanity, all you must do is realize that everyone is trying just as hard as you to make it, we all just have different roles to play. You become an active participant in life again, and start feeling like a citizen of a new world.
See Your Surroundings
As part of this new world, you will want to take in every single new experience. The goal should be to create a new memory every moment of the day. Following your highest excitement will create a constant stream of energy flowing throughout your Universe, that you will become a part of in a Universal Dance of all beings fused into One. We are completely inseparable from our environment, and the sooner we realize it, the sooner we can take it all in. There is so much to experience at any given moment (especially right Now), that it takes our complete and full awareness to sense all of it. When you do, you start to feel yourself transforming to a higher vibration, along with all the rest of your world.
Appreciate the Love
You just have to. You are closing your eyes TO everything if you do not see love IN everything. It’s all around us and through us, continuously flowing forever and ever. Take a moment to consider how the world and everything in it has been here longer than your current lifespan. Then go deeper and see that you were part of the love that made your world grow, even before you entered it. Now fully appreciate the love it took for every being to come together for just this moment for you to experience it in exactly the way it is. This is the definition of authentic presence or living in the Now, and it is crucial to allowing NEW love to enter your life.
Pay it Forward
What is this new love of which I speak? With each person it touches, love has the opportunity to grow. First it grows the person’s heart that has received the love, and then it will expand through transference to another being; growing in magnitude since it takes extra love from the giver to let this experience go. That’s what paying it forward is all about. Never hold on to an awesome feeling of love when you get it; share it with the world! Shout it from the mountain tops and give it freely to everyone you meet. When you do this, every being in the Universe will be inspired by this love and will begin to share more love too. It’s an unending cycle that can only make the world and our own lives better many times over.
Always the hardest part. Being on the edge of the cliff is scarier than falling through the air. If we just jump, we have nothing left to fear. And what is life that we should fear falling? Doesn’t it make a better story? Isn’t it a new adventure? If this isn’t what you seek, then you are missing some lesson you have yet to learn. For those who feel free, there is no sense in repeating yesterday; make each day new for you are a new person! We get the opportunity to wake up in a new world each and every day, if we just let go of the past. Realize the past has no bearing on today; it cannot dictate what you do in any way. The only limitation on this concept is your own mind. Do not be trapped by the web of lies the ego can thread, instead wipe them clear and see without the mists of yesterday.
Let Love Grow
Just like with gardening, once you have planted the seed, nature takes over. Some watering and light tending to the weaker parts of the plant is required, but do we really make the plant grow? So it is with love. Whenever you have felt like you were working too hard at a relationship, whenever you couldn’t see eye to eye with a loved one, whenever it seemed like you were fighting every odd to survive; this is because you weren’t letting go and letting love grow. We get stuck into feeling like we have to ‘make it work,’ and that we have to do our part to prove our love. The only proof of love is just to be love. Be joyful in the love you have; don’t expect it to feel like it did yesterday. Give it a chance to grow; see the potential for greatness in every moment and every being. If we don’t; if we say that it can’t be love anymore, then we are limiting ourselves and the experience of our surroundings. We may even bring down the vibration of others so that we see them in their more primal state. The higher we bring ourselves, or rather the higher we realize ourselves to be, the higher we see others, and so the higher we all become. This is a form of spiritual evolution that occurs in beings who seek awareness and peace.
It’s hard to take our hands off the steering wheel once we’ve set off in motion, but it must be done. We have to give love a chance to grow on its own, so that it can come back tenfold and surprise us with its new form. This is living in the new world, and all of us can do it every single day, just by restoring our humanity, seeing our surroundings, appreciating the love in our environment, paying it forward, and letting love grow. In the same way, let others grow by letting them go. Give all the love you can to those who enter your life, and then let go all expectation of return. For many times it will not be the one you give your love to that returns it, but it will be all the more sweeter when you realize who it is. Sadly, reciprocation of love is not something we can ever expect, or ever fully realize. You cannot control if a person gives back the love you give to them, nor should you want them to. Let them give love in their own ways and a mutual peace will form between you. This is the way to harmony. It starts with you. So get going! Until next time, Namaste.